Commendation: The Simpsons

The Simpsons, specifically the episode "Homer the Heretic," is commended for showing Homer listening to the radio in the shower on a product called the "No-Soap Radio."

Probation Alert: Noah

Noah is on probation for suggesting that I should list my place of employment as "Vandalay Industries" on my rent application when it is actually "Vandelay."

Probation Alert: Sam

Sam is on probation for putting me on probation for something I never even said.

Probation Alert: Nasha and Noah

Nasha and Noah are on probation for claiming that Dane Cook is not funny. I realize this is a lame probation post, but I am only using it as a preemptive strike against them since they threatened to put me on probation for saying he is funny (i.e. being correct).

Probation Alert: All of Us

We are all on probation for saying "You're flawed!" The actual dialogue is:
Martin: "Your very question is faulty."
Nelson: "You're faulty!"

Probation Alert: Rob

Rob is on probation for studying for the MCAT (six days before the test) on his 21st birthday instead of getting trashed.

Probation Alert: Ross

Ross is on probation for saying "Now it will be more fun when I don't punch you on the way down" instead of "Now, when you do this without getting punched, you’ll have more fun." I would have also accepted: "Now, when you do this without getting punched in the chest, you’ll have more fun."

Probation Alert: Santa Clara County Fair

The Santa Clara County Fair is on probation for closing down ticket sales at 7 pm on a summer's Saturday. Do those carnies even want to make money?

Probation Alert: Kara

Kara is on probation for not recognizing Paul Rudd's "Bri-man" quote from Anchorman, and for creating an awkward moment when she temporarily thought that I had actually nicknamed my penis "The Octagon" and my testes "James Westfall and Dr. Kenneth Noisewater."

Probation Alert: Nasha

Nasha is on probation for claiming that Nina Myers told Jack Bauer to take her to Valencia, even though she actually demanded that he take her to Visalia.